Where are They Now: Easter Shame with Fake Mustaches

The long loved Easter icons, the Easter Bunny and the chicken that always accompanies him, once beloved by children, lead very different lives now.


The Easter Chicken

The once sidekick to the Easter Bunny is a travesty to all holiday gift bearers everywhere. He said he originally got into this business because he loved children. Now, he hangs out outside clubs that he can't get into because they are for the kiddies aged 14 to 18. He drinks his days away and sleeps most nights in his van. Not one of those cool vans that have carpet and beaded curtains. No, an old catering delivery van that has a metal floor and smells like pickles.

The Easter Bunny

A shrewd business man now. He still has the same job he always had, delivering the goodies on Easter morning. Sometime in the 80's, he decided he had had enough of the way things were mis-managed. He went back to school and got and MBA from Vanderbuilt. He now runs the show with technology. He delivers all his eggs in his moderately priced Chrysler, LeBaron. He is also the president of a the National Holiday Goody Givers Union which boasts such members as Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy.

Below is his office showing the digital maps and schedules that now dicate his day and his briefcase with a selection of finely made Easter goods that he takes to meetings making sure to give the right product to each client.

PS, Sue Y., there is a 60% off sale at Coldwater Creek right now and Ali wanted you to know.

PPS We still have more fake mustaches.